Andy Mcnab
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If you won a competition to appear in a TV programme in which Andy McNab (in disguise) and YOU were to be dropped on a uninhabited tropical island for three months with two other male celebrity companions of YOUR choice and another non-celebrity woman, who would you choose? Your objective to survive or escape from said island and make it back to base.
If I won it would have to be Michael Palin: Just think of all the UNTOLD stories of his travels, not least his Around the World in Eighty Days Challenge, and his natural Monty Python slant.
Can you imagine him and Andy together, your life would be one long laugh-a-minute.Who would want to escape before the three months deadline.
Then there's Ray Mears: What Andy doesn't know about survival and security tactics, at least you can be sure Ray Mears will improvise and turn up trumps with fire, light breakfasts and suppers, (no rats please) plus immediate drinking water.
Think about it, that would leave Andy free to go hunt for big game and hoped for spit roast, as in, show his skill (prowess) with bow & arrows.
Now, choosing another woman is not as tricky as first thought, not for me that is, given that I can hunt and kill and skin and gut if I have to:
Needless to say I'd let every woman on this board draw straws, the shortest would get to go to the island, 'cos that way I could laze around and go fishing with Michael Palin and keep watch for signs of passing ships etc, (keep a fire stoked). Meantime, member of F-Troop can assist Andy, or not, dependent upon whether he would prefer to hunt alone, and member of F-Troop subsequently told to watch, listen, and learn from Ray Mears just in case he fell ill or Andy got injured and unable to hunt. Then again you might get lucky and get to go hunting with Andy - for days at a time.
Why have I chosen MP and RM alongside AM? Because I'd likely shoot a loud-mouth like Eddie Stone - constantly barking orders. If ever the chips are down, I prefer the company of quiet men, except when laughing...
>>By buddy (Tuesday, 30 Dec 2003 14:16)
Astro:
Re Xmas-blasphemy: I've been watching a great deal of taped Blackadder-episodes recently. If that's not a source (and inspiration) for sarcasm, I don't know what is.... ;)
Re: B20 (the movie): I saw it around the time it was first released (which is quite a while now), and I thought it was a good flick. I suspect you won't get too much out of it if you haven't read the book or have knowledge about the background story though....
And, for some strange reason, they decided to change the names of the characters in the movie compared to the ones used in the book.
I also recommend watching the movie-version of CR's The One That Got Away, even though he himself publically disapproved of it (he was promised to get the final word on how things would be portrayed in the movie, but was cut out of the loop by the production-company at some point).
>>By ortlieb (Tuesday, 30 Dec 2003 18:15)
Hey guys guess what im back! lol you all miss me??
Had a little bit of spare time and thought id rejoin here, way too many pages to catch up!! so if theres anything important i need to know someone please tell me lol
r.e buddys competition thing, yeah i would have chosen the same two celebrity males, michael palins pole to pole trip is being repeated again can't remember what time or channel and ray mears is on straight before it. Plus id probly choose lynn for the non-celebrity woman.
Happy New Year!
>>By christina (Wednesday, 31 Dec 2003 15:03)
Happy New Year, All!
Paul R, as our Aussie point man, you're aalready well into next year by now! And somewhere around could be Jacko (maybe on a jet) and Always Surfin (maybe on NZ's shores), too.
The Euro Team is tabbing nine hours behind, almost in alpha order no less!
Alice, Borisette, Deusrexmachina, Lethe, Lynn, MG, Ortlieb, Swedish Reader, Trident, Phil, and Lem45.
And then comes the UK patrol (nearly in alpha order) -- definitely a force to be reckoned with (MIA's included): Apparently (formerly Sheba), Bethan, Bikergirl, Buddy, Christina, Ignaty, Minimi, Nabby, Nomad, Pe Gasus, Pompelmous, Saxon, Scouse, TabariGoddess, Big-Ste, Bleo, Chamonixboarders, Chris, Cpm, Eagles Nest, Echo 5, Geist, H (formerly H…), Jaffagib5rgj, Julia, Just Plain Paddy (formerly Fenian Bastard), Nick Stone, Nutter (formerly…), Pacemaker, Paul W, Pete, Robbie Boy, Roomservice, Saxon, Scuderia, ShadowRaptor, Shanti941, Sp10122, Ste, Stirling, and Wingman.
Bringing up rear, the Tail-end Charlies, is the US/Canada crew -- a minimum of 15 hours behind Aussies, 6 behind Euros, and 5 behind UKs: Astroboy, The Captain, Dare, Dirkpitt1972, DTO, Donni, Sexibeast, and, oh yeah, a-i-b...
It's hard to believe a year has passed, but it proves the adage: Time does fly when you're having fun!
With best wishes to everyone for a happy, healthy and safe New Year, and with fervent hopes that our quiet lurkers and all of our MIAs will join (or rejoin) us during the coming year!
And, of course, AM, this means YOU!
* Note: If I missed anyone, humblest apologies! But, of course, if I missed you, then you definitely need to speak up!!!! hahaha!
>>By am-i-binned (Wednesday, 31 Dec 2003 19:37)
Happy New Year, one and all!
AIB, excellent job on the roll call. Some of the MIAs must go back a ways. I've read through many of the pages that predate my involvement, but there are some names on your list that I haven't seen.
So, I'm pondering buddy's scenario. Me, AM, two additional men, and one woman. Hmm. Since my wife occasionally checks out this board, she is OBVIOUSLY the woman (whew, there's one less argument). I like the thought of a funny guy coming along, but I would probably go with Jerry Seinfeld (my favorite Python was Graham Chapman, RIP). Not sure who from the real world would get the nod for the last spot. From the world of make-believe, it would probably have to be Hawkeye from "Last of the Mohicans". Big game hunter par exellence, dead-eye shot, probably would be able to figure out the modern firearm, and my wife HATES the hair!
Anyone have any New Year's traditions they adhere to? New Year's Resolutions are probably universal. Here in the Old South, we eat a bowl of black-eyed peas (which are really a type of bean) for good luck. Not sure it works for luck, but it will clear the unwanted guests out of your house on New Years Day!
>>By Astroboy (Wednesday, 31 Dec 2003 21:01)
Hey guys, it's 11:30 p.m., 31th December 2003... and soon will pass on the champagne (actually it's Coke... )!
I've to read all the previous last messages and will take me some time, but hope to be able to post at middight, EXACTLY! *grins*
See ya! :P
>>By Deusrexmachina (Wednesday, 31 Dec 2003 23:29)
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!! *champagne poppings and popcorn champagning sounds* o_O
May all your wet dishes... er no, BEST WISHES come true; drive safe, don't drink & drive (please...), have lotsa fun and... well, to all those I've met here (the order is not important: Am-I-Binned, B.A.B.E.S. -aka BikerGirl & Borisette-, Buddy, Trident, Lynn... er, Marek Gibney for Flork.com, and all those I've sadly missed! :( ) AND in particular to Mr Andy McNab,
HAPPY NEW YEAR FOLKS!
:D
>>By Deusrexmachina (Wednesday, 31 Dec 2003 23:59)
happy new years to everyone... this is apparently the first message in 2004! whee... i guess all that training in the military wasn't in vain... i'm first to the target!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
BONNE ANNÉE
FROHES NEUES JAHR
GOTT NYTT ÅR
HYVIÄ UUSIA VUOSIA
>>By trident (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 01:07)
Drat... one minute early!? ¬_¬
Can't be, I've posted at -18 seconds before midnight! [-(
Oh well, HAPPY NEW YEAR! :D
Guess I'll have a bite now: anyone for a 4 a.m. pizza?
o_O
>>By Deusrexmachina (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 04:03)
Happy New Year you guys!!! Hope you've partied hard...
My New Years resolution is to face up to my fears...
So...Mr McNab...I need your help to overcome my fear of being a character in a Nick Stone novel...
Back soon-ish
>>By bikergirl (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 12:32)
Gawd above, I fell into 2004 - cheers - hic, surfaced merely an hour ago.
Food for thought:
As we go forth into 2004 one can't help comparing the natural disasters of 2003 to that of man-made catastophies 2003 and the tragedy in death and localised/global ecological damage. Yet, already our military men and leaders are holding councils of war.
So, where and who next is the big question for 2004.
Where next then for UK Special Forces for pre intel before main strike force, and their invaluable experience in post clean up intel operations?
How many more women and children, and innocent male civilians will die in far off places that half the people on this board have no knowledge of (their culture/lifestyle).
Of course, military lives will be lost but that will be expected on both sides by the military and their chief stick wagger.
How many more situations like Afghanistan/Iraq are we to be witness to? - still ongoing with poverty, lack of fresh water supplies, lack of food (lack of basic infrastructure) as destroyed by Western bombing.
Despite all the Western propaganda that a rebuild programme is already underway in Afghanistan/Iraq has anyone seen TV news footage of bulldozers, brick/stone lorries, concrete mixers, bricklayers/stonemasons pipelayers, etc., rebuilding? If there are such mass rebuilds underway why then can we not see them, why can we not be witness to this so-called wondrous happening? Yet, we can clearly see that the vast majority of oil fields (Iraq) are no longer blazing, except when a pipeline is blown up by terrorists. And, so the oil pumps and flows and who benefits?
I suppose it could be said: at least the Iraqi people don't have black clouds overhead and the stench of burning oil, but they do have the stench of raw sewage seeping and running along the streets where children play, (which they didn't have before GW2) and just think what awful diseases come with raw sewage and contaminated wells.
If the main objective in the Iraq war was to free the Iraqi peoples from oppression and a brutal regime, (though in truth we know it was all about oil) what was the real objective in the war against Afghanistan?
Oh shucks, I forgot, it was all about a revenge attack against one man, the prime objective getting Osama bin Laden for Al Qaeda's attack on the Twin Towers, (if he's the real leader <?> and would you believe it, hero like and still evading capture).
Hell, he could be swigging back iced lemon in some plush pad: who knows, possibly even Stateside. After all, smart shave, hair cut and couple of dunks with Gretian 2000, and decked out in an Armani suit, would any one of you recognise him as anything other than a handsome man? (women that is). Isn't the Western mind-set clued to a tall man with badger coloured hair and beard, wearing Afghani tribal costume? Would we even recognise him if he passed by wearing traditional cloth of his homeland (Saudi)?
Cor, just think, Andy has so much he could write into forthcoming books, simply because fiction does give poetic licence to spin exciting yarns which could be true, may be true, or may come true: one day...
>>By buddy (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 13:05)
HAPPY NEW YEAR to all of you!!!!!!!!!!!
For the New year we have to eat lentels, they are like small flat beans (terrible on your bowls), and the more you eat them the more money you'r gonna get in the future. Plus grapes, they bring good luck. Then everybody goes out in the streets to see the fireworks and little flashbangies. The best place is to go to Napoli, at midnight it's as if
WW3 has started, people even start shooting from their balcony, or let of fireworks from their house.
Accidents always happen offcourse.
Survival Island, well Mears is ok with me, even if I don't know him, but I'm sure his skills would be needed, as for the other man, I was thinking more like having Steve Irwin around, so he could clear my way of all the snakes, alligators, spiders, and he's a funny bloke aswell. I'm sure he'd get on with AM. As for the woman,hmmmm well this is a hard one, I think I'd do the straw thing too, wouldn't want to hurt anyones feelings with favoratisme.
>>By borisette (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 13:06)
Gelukkig nieuw jaar or, a Happy New Year to everyone!
I think I'd prefer the lentils to our traditional new year's snack, the oil ball, which is dough fried in oil and consists mostly of grease.
Well, the fireworks were nice, and we all had a lot of fun (and coicidentally, we watched several episodes of Black Adder, the kids loved it) apart from the neighbours who thought 1000 or so firecrackers was a bit much.
About the B20 movie: I thought is was great, although you miss out on some of the background information.
I saw the movie before I read the books, and it was because of it that I started reading Andy's books.
I think Sean Bean is a wonderful actor, who represents Andy very well.
>>By Lethe (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 15:44)
Happy New Year all. Hope everybody had a good time. Be well and take care.
>>By Dare (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 19:16)
Enough happy wishes here to last a life time :o)
May all good things come in two, so you can give one away..
Have fun, take care
>>By Lynn (Thursday, 1 Jan 2004 22:27)
Thank you very much for the above post "buddy". Ahh yes one of the lurking men has risin to begin a new year of posting and I'll bite.
Sour, no not really comming from the source, but do you really believe all you said, please. I know the evil West and our evil ways with our evil leaders and are benign public. Gosh darn it we just roll over and play pasty.
Well maybe you should ask the 500,000 souls that are being dug out of their mass graves what it was like prior to GW2. I just finished a 4 hr Fronline episode that showed what Iraq life was like when freedom was not possible under your friend Saddam. Very pleasant indeed.
What comes in 4 mos buddy, we all here can hardly wait to know. I remember tyhough you have a hard time answering the tough questions though.
Happy New Year...
>>By DTO (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 01:06)
Happy New Year everyone. Hope 2004 is good to you all.
I finished IA and have to say it left me with a bit more respect for Andy boy. Like CR he admits to being a bad dancer. You all seem to have missed this - these regiment fellows are not the John Travoltas you all led me to believe they were!
Also bought The Hit List (CR I know I know!)
On the Survival Island personell. Ray Mears annoys the hell out of me, I'd only take him if there was no food on the island and I could persuade AM to hunt Ray Mears so we could eat the pompous porker.
There's a guy from the US called Tom Brown Jr - I'd take him as my first celebrity. He's an interesting character who could do all that Ray Mears would in terms of survival skills but not in that pompous way that I find so irritating.
My second 'celebrity' would be Saddam Hussein. It would be interesting to make an introduction and see what AM and SH have to say to one another face to face. The rules would be strict - they can only talk and they have to cooperate.
Non celebrity female is a tricky one. My sister's good at fishing and I would trust her in this closed environment, where as I wouldn't trust either AM or SH and would be constantly on edge watching them and my back.
Your skills would no doubt come in very useful Buddy in this situation so I would have no qualms about including you as my non celebrity female.
How's your boat building ability?
RAY Mears skin might make a useful waterproof skin for a wee corracle if we tanned it.
Anyway all the best to you all.
>>By Nomad (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 11:04)
Ok This is a question to everybody but answers back one at a time please.
Does anybody actually know the true events that unfolded when bravo two zero were compromised? from sources other than the authers?.
>>By The Yes Man (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 12:10)
DTO: I have absolutely no problem answering difficult questions from well-informed people. That is not to say, those who rely solely upon contemporary TV documentaries or CNN broadcasts 'alone' to gain knowledge of certain aspects to do with foreign countries and foreign nationals.
The majority of the occupants of mass graves were inturned during the period between GW1 and GW2 - Saddam's punishment to those who supported/sympathised with the Allied advance GW1, mostly peoples of the southern regions of Iraq bordering Kuwait, (OIL rich soil). Unfortunately, the atrocities toward the Kurds in the north, (bordering Turkey - also Oil rich soil) were persecuted long before W1 by Saddam when Bush (US President) was slapping him on the back as a friend and allied supplier of Oil to the West, post Iranian anit America and "piss off Yanks!!!" attitude.
It would help you to understand the Kurds plight as a dispossed peoples in the north and why the Turks still hate the Kurds, if you were to put a little more effort in to looking up history of the Middle East instead of suggesting publicly that my head is up my own arsehole!
You might also learn a little more about the various religious/tribal sects that exist in Iraq and which religious denomination Saddam was born to (though hardly religious in what he did to fellow Iraqis), and why he despised peoples of the Southern Regions. Sorry, don't see why I should have to give you a history lesson in full - look up Sunnis and Shii'tes.
Anyone who suggests I'm a friend of Saddam needs to rethink upon rereading what I actually said...
>>By buddy (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 12:13)
DTO: re Osama bin Laden, who was at one time a financial investor/partner in several of Bush's (US President) companies stateside, and who apparently was cheated out of millions of dollars in shady deals. The Twin Towers, Pentagon, proposed Whitehouse attacks were far more personal than many Americans will ever know or trouble to find out about.
Nothing is ever black or white in politics and business, huge grey areas exist in our world regarding finance and diplomatic moves to cover ups and reasons for wars. Who would have thought that Hitler's invasion of Poland WW2 would incite Britain to declare war upon Germany, after all we didn't prior to invasion of Poland despite politicians in the UK and the US well aware of mass persecution of Jews inclusive labour camps and killing zones....
>>By buddy (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 12:24)
The Yes Man:
Answer: Yes, on very good authority, (second to none) but can't say who!!!
>>By buddy (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 12:28)
Nomad: it's the pomposity that would make for entertainment.
Hold those chocolates, I'll be with you later.
>>By buddy (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 12:32)
The end of an old year
The beginning of a new
Best wishes for 2004
To everyone
Some very similar writing styles from (apparently) different writers on this board.
Some people are leaving
New additions arrive
And the similarities remain
>>By geist (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 12:35)
I seem to recall there being a misunderstanding between CR and AM.
But who do i believe is telling the truth. Niether.
As proud of the lads as i am i still know that the truth is yet to be uncovered and when it is all **** is gonna break loose. time is running out just like it did for Bob and Vince.
The situation they were exposed to was unessassary. The equipment was inferior and the intelligence was so far off the mark it was unbelievable that one of the most advanced countries in the west could produce such shocking miscalculations for a team already in danger by going in covert. Like we say, proper preparation prevents piss poor perfomance and unfortunatly the foundation for preparation was sacrificed for speed. What was the purpose of this quick deployment,
only the headsheds know that one. Was it to impress someone? Show the world how quickly we could be ready to strike?
Where were the headsheds when an extraction was needed?
The one thing i know for sure is that men put their lives in the hands of these incompetant fools and who pays the price?.
THE FAMILY'S
>>By The Yes Man (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 13:20)
I don't know much about Middle east - either the politics or the culture so I won't pass comment, but currently the Al Quaeda situation is in virtually every military/thriller fiction I pick up.
The way I see it Saddam Hussein wasn't such a nice fella but he became a scape goat rather than a genuine target because OBL was too elusive for Bush II.
If OBL had been captured I don't think we would have seen GWII so soon.
MI6 have been currying favour for taking Saddam out since the late 1990's. Planting WMD stories in foreign press. There's a lot done in our name that we will never fully appreciate and I'm sure it's better not to know the half of it. Bottom line - I don't trust ANY politicians ever. They are full of crap. I'd like to see them marooned on an island and forced to survive - see how many of them really have the basic skills when the suites and kitten heels come off.
Forgive my negligent discharges, there's still alcohol in my blood and I may not make either sense or objective points.
The chocolates are waiting Buddy. Any preference for the tangerine surprise or the coffee liquers?
Mr Yes MAN, Only those that were present at the events will ever know the truth as it actually happened. I read everything with a pinch of salt.
>>By Nomad (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 16:02)
Well it's nice to see people coming back from the Xmas holidays.
Ooh Nomad, if those chokies are Godiva, leave some for me please....:) don't spoil them all on Buddy.
Yes man,.....don't know maybe it'll be interesting reading Soldier Five by Coburn, due out this february (He's the kiwi from B20, in case you didn't remember, but I guess you do).
>>By borisette (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 17:01)
Anyway I've changed my mind about the survival thingy: it's gonna be AM and me, and me and AM just the 2 of us, the less we are the better, more space, more food and better chance to escape from the island, I'll take CR's survival guide with me that'll do the job allright.
>>By borisette (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 17:09)
Ooooh and can I choose the island too, so nobody from F-troop will poof me away to replace me..??
>>By borisette (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 17:28)
Chocolates for everyone Borrisette - call me the milk tray man, except those polo necks itch like buggery and are very suspect and I can't ski - doubt you'd ever see AM in a polo neck. Much more a black lambswool V neck job I think.
Noone in work today - here I am all alone, catching up on florks, got Charlene on the CD singing Never Been to me on repeat and boxes of pre Christmas chocs and a party pack of Irn bru. Lovely job.
Back Monday hic!
>>By Nomad (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 18:05)
Oh absolutely, Yes Man. You couldn't be more correct on the backup and preparations for B20 as nothing less than shite effort.
However, and easy enough for anyone not there to say, (F-Troop - not involved at the time) that the men were not educated nor suitably briefed by military superiors. (I don't mean intellectually deficient but lacking general knowledge. The Bravo 2 Zero boys and senior officers should have learnt/known about Iraq etc - in terms of history/geography at school - and would therefore have been cognisant to the type of terrain they were entering into. Desert is not always just sand dunes and rocky plains and wadis, there are mountains, the desert in terms of habitable environment not so = damn right bloody hostile with flutuating temperatures from top to bottom of sweating and freezing.
Andy admits he wagged school a lot. I guess many of the senior officers at their cushy boarding schools weren't learning much either!! Not surprisiing then that old boys who served in the Middle East during WW2 look upon present upper military ranks as a bunch of no hopers in terms of tactical warfare - too much techy game-play and too little common sense combined with intel.
>>By buddy (Friday, 2 Jan 2004 18:53)
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